Lover's Dementia ｡
by rainbowedtri
Summary: A bittersweet story about a lonely hikkimori and a cold, twisted bartender. Psychological. Rin / Len / Kaito
1. Languid Nights

Hikikomori ひきこもり or 引き籠もり ?

A Japanese term that refers to the phenomenon of reclusive people who have chosen to withdraw from society, often seeking extreme degrees of isolation and confinement.

While many people feel the pressures of the outside world, a hikikomori reacts by complete social withdrawal. [1] In some cases, they lock themselves in a room for prolonged periods, sometimes measured in years. They usually have few, if any, friends.

Hikikomoris usually favor indoor activities, but some do venture outdoors on occasion.

[ Japanese Agoraphobia - Wikipedia ]

* * *

Rin gripped her phone tightly, walking in a daze towards whatever direction the pavement led her to. Her eyes were groggy. Nothing looked familiar. Light fall rain pelted at her pale, ashen skin, and clung to the small folds of her clothes. She had kept her hair long, way past her shoulders - a striking contrast to the bold, short hairstyles she sported as a child. The time was nearing midnight.

The weather's chilling dampness seeped through the layers of her clothes. Nothing but cold, musty, drizzling rain. It left her with a lingering feeling of melancholy. Every weighted step made her head spin, her fingers tingle - her insides lurch. She wanted to throw up.

Music streamed loudly from the neighboring clubs. Soft, hushed whispers resonated off old, dirty, brick walls. The outside world was a demented wonderland orchestrating a cacophony of sounds, just for her.

The city was always vibrant at night - filled with neon lights and the relentless honking of cars. Tokyo was alive and bustling. She exhaled in short, panicky breaths_. I really. Really. Hate this._

The young blonde shivered.

In front of her was a large, charcoal-colored building. The crooked sign labeled "Leo's Stage & Bar" hung up in bright, neon colors. The 'A' and "E" in 'Stage' refused to light up.

A soft rustling sound interrupted her concentration. Looking to the left, she noticed enormous piles of garbage littering an abandoned alleyway. The subtle scent of mist, week-old trash, and decay assaulted her nose. The world was more sad than she had remembered it.

Rin was just about to leave, but she heard a cry from the alleyway. _Breathe_, she demanded herself. It was her first time out in god-knows-how-long. Ever since her dad disappeared. Ever since she was left to fend for herself. _Now breathe._

Instead of witnessing some monster or strange phenomenon emerge out of the dark alleyway, she saw the shadowy silhouette of a person. The figure stumbled a bit, but then promptly regained their composure, keeping their eyes low and hidden. I_t was a boy._ A man. Roughly her age maybe, with slick blond-colored hair, drenched in the wet, midnight rain. He tilted his head up, and for a moment - their eyes met. Suddenly, it got harder to breathe, harder to think-harder to look away. His startled, brooding eyes scanned hers for an emotion. They were a cold, striking blue; shining brightly like polished sapphire. They glistened. Whether his teary eyes were from the rain or from crying, she had no way of knowing. Averting his gaze, he moved with a smooth, subtle gracefulness despite his weary and doleful state.

"Hi. Can I help you?"

She blinked, almost dreamily, as if her current situation were someone else's, and she was only a stranger - merely watching the scene from the sidelines.

Long eyelashes. Soft hair. _He's prettier than me_, she thought.

"I - I don't know. I think I'm lost," Rin stated dumbly.

The guy let out a dark, humorless chuckle.

_Shit, that sounded lame._

Flustered, she broke their gaze and looked down at the rough, cracked asphalt. "I don't go out much."

Well. Maybe that was a bit of an understatement. Try at all.

"I'm Len," he offered. His voice was dry, devoid of any emotion.

_Len._

Rin liked the sound of it. Short, blunt, and to-the-point.

_Kind of like him._

He ran his fingers through his drenched, slightly disheveled hair, and made his way closer to her and the bar. All signs of the vulnerable-looking boy were gone as he edged closer to her, and for the first time, Rin noticed the stale scent of alcohol on his breath.

"You're... _pretty_," he mumbled, and raised a slender hand to toy with her long, golden strands. The intimate act was shocking. She froze, unable to move. His body leaned forward, like he was about to fall over, and she reached out her arms to steady his shaky frame. Len's thick lashes closed, almost contentedly, as his body heaved in and out, like muffled sobs trying to force their way out. The red warning signs were ringing inside her brain, yet she couldn't will herself to move. Leave. _Go home._ He might be dangerous.

But she couldn't let go.

"You're drunk. Stop."

Rin wasn't sure what to do. Only then did she remember why she never left the house - the real world was too _intense._ Perverse. Awkward situations were too much for her to handle.

She stole another glance at him. The guy looked about seventeen or eighteen - give or take. "Lilly, you bitch," he muffled into her shoulder, clearly confused and light-headed from the rain and alcohol. "You smell good," he breathed.

For whatever reason, the young girl felt a small pang in her heart. Swiveling her head to the side, Rin let the little rain droplets slide down past her cheeks, mixing in with something salty. She watched him as he continued mumbling "Lily" over and over again.

* * *

**A/N**: Hi. A new kind of vocaloid fic.  
Comment, criticize, etc.  
It's helpful to know if anyone's interested in it for me to continue.  
I mostly write cracky comedies, so I tried a serious approach for once, aha.


	2. PRE Hysteria

"Uh, hi. Can I help you?"

The tawny-haired male raised an eyebrow at Rin, whom supported a heavy, unconscious boy on her shoulder. Although she had entered Leon's bar out of desperation, she was now at a loss of what to do. Her social interactions over the past few years were brief and infrequent. Slowly, the neon sign flickered and danced, ridiculing her hesitation. _One, two, three._ She took a big breath.

"This boy... he passed out in the alleyway. Is there any chance he could rest here until he wakes up?"

The man smiled, noticing the shaky edge to her tone.

"Baby, _relax_. Sure he can stay. You come as well; you're completely soaked."

Before she could protest, he took hold of the blond boy's arms and positioned it onto his back, as if to carry him. Without even struggling, he readjusted his position and carried the boy through as if he were made of air. Rin entered the warm room with a feeling of excitement and apprehension. The room was toasty and comforting, embellished with bold colors like orange and red, which complimented the rustic decor. Wine and various assortments of alcohol littered the shelves behind the bolstered stools, and a small stage was positioned up front. A performer strummed his guitar with a low, deep hum, mostly singing to himself rather than his small audience. The music that emitted from his fingertips was soothing.

"Welcome to Leon's Bar," the man chuckled. He looked at her, his eyes alight with a shine. "I'm Leon."

The boy on his back groaned, mumbling into Leon's shirt. "The he... ck. Mmpf."

"Looks like your boyfriend's waking up."

Rind's eyes glossed over, cold.

"He's not my boyfriend."

A short silence ensued.

"Whoa there, I was joking. You're looking out for him though; that's nice."

"_Sure._"

She could feel a slight blush start to color her pale cheeks. Shit.

Leon ushered her towards a stool in front of the bartender-whom flashed them a quick smile. Rin forced a smile back. While he propped the boy up against the stool, she took some time to admire the humble interior of the bar. The outside was falling apart, but the inside wasn't quite as damaged. It was nice.

"You can ask Greg anything if you have questions," he told her, pointing to the bartender. "I'll be in the back chatting with the performers, okay?"

She nodded in understanding.

Leon hesitated, as if reluctant to leave them alone. He soon however, heard distant voice shouting his name in the background, calling for him. He waved goodbye and smiled, then proceeded to head off.

Slight rustling was heard from behind her, and then a loud groan.

"_What in the actual fuck?_" The guy was now awake, blinking groggily in mild confusion. She remembered-he said his name was Len. A short, quick, "lets-cut-to-the-chase" name like hers.

"You passed out, and I wasn't sure what to do," she stammered.

His intense glare softened as he turned to look at her. Gradually, his stare transformed into one of recognition. His eyes grew large.

"You were the girl outside. The one who was lost."

She was surprised he remembered.

"Yeah."

"Oh." His tone grew into one of despair. "I'm sorry. _So sorry._ I did something weird, didn't I?"

"You did nothing," she said softly.

"I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing."

"S - "

He laughed nervously, drunkenly, then hysterically. His laughter then hiccuped into a sob.

"I've made a mistake." Every word emitted from his lips sounded like a sigh.

Len's wet, tangled hair covered his eyes. She suddenly wanted to fix it. Without thinking, her hands reached forward and gently brushed the flyaway strands aside. He flinched at her touch. Then, he leveled his gaze to meet hers.

An amused smile suddenly graced his face, and she felt insulted. She wanted to slap it away.

"What's your name?"

"Rin. I - I'm Rin." _Why did I do that? Holy shit._

She couldn't even stand to look at him; she was too embarrassed. For a while, none of them said anything.

"Thank you." He cleared his voice, attempting to break the grudging silence. "Look, I'll take you home, okay? If you're lost."

"But you're _drunk_."

Len laughed. "Not enough, unfortunately. It's safe, I swear."

Casually, his arms reached over to grab hold of her own small, clammy hands.

"Let's go."

The reassurance in his voice made her forget she was lost. For a moment, her worries and hatred against the world vanished, evanescing away. He smiled and she felt like she was falling.

People scared her. Because they hurt her. He scared her more than anything she had ever encountered.

* * *

**A/N:** I want to continuously update this.  
But it depends on how many people are interested thus far, aha.  
; - ; Sobs, Rin in faring well for an agoraphobe. Cue emotional breakdown in 5, 4, 3 -  
Oh, and do not drive while drunk! Len is fictional and he's allowed to. If you're fictional, then have at it.  
Otherwise, big no-no. Thank you for reading this, and any feedback is greatly appreciated!  
Keeps me motivated, ect.


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